Florida Man Report – July 23

July 23 – Florida Man Steals a Car and Then Calls Its Owner To Report the Theft

If you saw stolen property and knew the owner’s phone number you’d want to alert them of the crime, right? That fact holds true for most of the kindhearted people in Florida. But, surprisingly enough, it holds for some thieves in Florida as well. In fact, one Florida man called in to report his own theft to the victim.

The Florida man in question, one Marquis Nance, allegedly broke into a woman’s car and drove off with it. However, Nance was also able to find her phone number. For reasons inexplicable to any but the Florida man himself, Nance decided to give the victim a call to tell her about the incident. Did Nance’s guilty conscience get the better of him? Did he simply want to gloat? Nobody can say why the Florida man made the call. But it certainly didn’t work out for him as Nance is facing charges of grand theft of a motor vehicle.

The Florida man even went so far as to deny the charges. A difficult proposition given the phone call. And, it turns out, more difficult when there’s surveillance camera footage of Nance exiting the vehicle. Things might be sunnier for the Florida man if not for a few other factors. The first is that he was carrying ammunition. Next, Nance is also facing felony charges which aren’t as charming as his odd joyride. These include imprisonment and battery of a law enforcement officer. The Florida man also has prior charges of domestic abuse and a second case of domestic battery by strangulation. However, despite everything, the victim of Nance’s theft jokes that it was “kind” of him to call her to report that he had her car.

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July 23 – Florida Man Has an Inventive New Idea for School Field Trips

Most adults have fond memories of school field trips. After all, field trips are one of the best parts of childhood. There’s just something about the freedom of seeing the world from that big yellow school bus that’s hard to match. Getting on the bus, the strange but reassuring awkwardness of the seats, even the slow drift through traffic on the way to the destination. And of course, what could ever beat that feeling you get when stepping out of the bus to explore a whole new part of your town?

All of those thoughts and more might have been going through the mind of a Florida man as he stared at an unoccupied school bus. But the Florida man, Daniel Saez, took those musings far further than anyone else ever has. Because Saez decided that he wasn’t going to let memories stay memories. The Florida man was going to recapture the excitement of a field trip for himself. And with a sense of determination, Saez illegally boarded the bus.

You might imagine that stealing a bus would be a blatant enough crime to result in instant arrest. But Saez managed to drive an impressive distance during his unplanned field trip. While the Florida man remained in Florida, he did manage to drive from one town to another before police finally apprehended him. It’s an impressive accomplishment when you’re operating a vehicle designed to get the attention of other drivers.

Saez was driving back to his point of origin to return the bus when things started to go wrong for him. As the Florida man drew closer to home police were finally able to apprehend him. Amusingly, Saez informed the officers that he was “high and drunk” in case that fact had escaped them. The Florida man was eventually arrested for grand theft.