Florida Man Report – July 15

July 15 – Florida Woman Weaponizes EpiPen

Two Florida sisters who share a home decided to relax and have a few adult beverages. When Joanna Zielinski decided she wanted to stay up and drink a bit longer, her sister decided to get some sleep. Zielinski was not willing to accept this result and took an EpiPen to her sister, puncturing her skin repeatedly and leaving a welt on her thigh. Her reasoning was that, since Zielinski was allergic to drunks, she would dose her sister with an EpiPen to sober her up.

Technically it’s not possible to be allergic to drunks. There are some allergies to drink that are severe enough to require an EpiPen, however.

A 911 call was placed but the caller hung up before dispatchers could communicate with the caller. Police responded to the hang-up and found the sisters in dispute, one of them armed with the aforementioned EpiPen. The EpiPen was prescribed for Joanna Zielinski, not for her sister. Stabbing the cause of your allergic reaction is, of course, not an effective method of avoiding a dangerous reaction. Because of the way Zielinski was holding the pen, her sister was not dosed with epinephrine.

Zielinski’s sister reported that this was not the first bout of domestic abuse between them, though she didn’t report any previous stabbings. It was not reported if Zielinski had ever had to dose herself with the EpiPen, but it is concerning that she was ineffective in administering the drug to someone else. It should be noted that there is little risk of danger in combining alcohol and epinephrine, though an EpiPen dosage can lead to a drop in blood pressure. Since alcohol can also lower blood for a short period of time, perhaps EpiPen fights are not a wise choice.

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July 15 – Florida Man Prince Midnight Puts Uncle Filip to Unique Purpose

Florida musician Prince Midnight was introduced to the heavy metal genre in the 90s by his Uncle Filip. When Uncle Filip died in a motorcycle crash in his 20s, his bones were initially sent to a local college in Greece. Eventually the bones made their way to his sister in the United States. Her son, Prince Midnight, decided to give those bones a way to share Filip’s favorite music.

Uncle Filip and family are members of the Greek Orthodox tradition. Cremation is not allowed in this faith, so Prince Midnight turned his spine and pelvis into an electric guitar that could allow Uncle Filip a way to be a part of the music scene in perpetuity. Uncle Filip’s skull also made the journey, but was damaged and not incorporated into the guitar.

The skeleton is well braced with a metal guitar neck that supports the human spine. This metal framework also aligns the pelvic bone or hips so the strings can ring. Like any stringed instrument, the composition of the structure will impact the sound produced. Bone vibrates, but not like a solid body wooden guitar. The jack for the guitar is incorporated into the back of Uncle Filip’s hip bone.

Living bone provides a different level of vibration than dead bone. Dead bone will continue to lose mass over time. It’s likely that Uncle Filip, via the Skelecaster, may produce a different sound over time. Fans of Prince Midnight will be able to compare the changes as the years go on.

There were members of Prince Midnight’s family that were a bit concerned about the musical future of Uncle Filip. Luckily, older family members, such as Prince Midnight’s mom, were convinced that Uncle Filip would prefer to live on in music rather than be buried in the United States.