Florida Man Files – June 16

June 16 – Armless Florida Man Charged for Allegedly Stabbing Tourist in Arm

What in the arm jealousy!

Many times when you walk up to a street man, you expect they are cool and friendly. However, not everything happens the conventional way in Florida. A man visiting the land learned a man was eyeing his arms maybe because he had lost his. It must be hard living without arms but the homeless man showed resilience when he picked up a pair of scissors and stabbed the tourist.

Jonathan Dale Crenshaw, a homeless man from South Beach, Fla had learned the art of painting using his legs. And for people visiting the state like Cesar Coronado, that must have been fascinating and worthy of a few cents. However, when a tourist walked up to him, he suddenly attacked him, stabbing him in the arm. What might have aggravated the armless artist that much? Was it because the tourist was asking for directions instead of buying his art pieces?

Besides, his choice of where to stab is also fascinating. He might have wanted to teach the tourist what it was like to lack arms and having to stay on the streets of such a wild state. Well, Crenshaw knew he was wrong and decided to use the same leg he stabbed Coronado with to flee from the scene.

It’s funny how a man without hands could attack an armed man (man with arms) without struggling. Besides, was Coronado just standing there to be attacked or that was the least he expected from Crenshaw?

His tiny feet couldn’t take him so far from the scene by the time the cops arrived. By the time cops got to him, Crenshaw had already thought of a whole plot that he could narrate to the cops in his favor. He claimed he had been lying when Coronado walked up to him and punched him in the head. So, he used his feet to open his bag, pulled out a pair of scissors, and stabbed the man in self-defense.

As Crenshaw was being incarcerated, the victim was left wondering how a man could stab another with his legs.

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June 16 – Video Shows Capuchin Monkey Clinging to Florida Man’s Chest During Stolen Vehicle Arrest

A diaper-wearing capuchin monkey was ready to go to jail when the cops cuffed its owner. Where else would it go, though?

A 23-year-old Florida man from Pasco County had carried along his pet monkey when he went to steal a vehicle. During his arrest, the capuchin monkey held tight to his chest, refusing to let go despite cops being so close. Photos of the monkey holding tight to the man’s T-shirt as he was being cuffed were posted online, attracting public sensation.

While some viewers speculated that he may not be trusted to have legal ownership of the animal, the monkey seemed to love being with him. Only a partner in crime would want to go stealing with you, huh? Plus, the monkey might have been getting awesome treats after its owner’s robbery missions, so why not?

However, in a sad turn of events, the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation established that the man lacked the legal rights and certifications to own the exotic animal. So, they parted Cody Blake Hession from his supportive friend and placed him in the care of the Suncoast Primate Sanctuary. Hession was taken to jail and held at the Land O’Lakes Detention Center.

In yet another monkey scenario, a Florida family went boating in a river in Silver Springs State Park when it started “raining monkeys.” The family might have received warnings about alligators and crazy squirrels but were surprised to see almost two dozen rhesus macaques jumping from trees and splashing into the water right in front of them.

The man had seen two troops of monkeys engage in a fight, at which he pulled out his phone and started recording. The troop, upon seeing defeat, plunged into the waters to get to the other side of the river, as the man explained in the video.